With special thanks to Mozart

An eerie calm descended upon the room. Little stars shone brightly on the ceiling. Toddlers and pre-schoolers (hundreds of them!) quietly sang “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star”.

I tell you nursery rhymes are the drug of choice!

Honestly, just one minute ago it was bedlam. We’re at the Playschool concert with our playgroup. We had all been singing and dancing, clapping and laughing. Lots of noisy fun with the little ones. And then with the dimming of the lights and stars on the ceiling they all calmed down. I think Playschool presenters are magic!

What’s your favourite nursery rhyme? I’m a huge fan of “Incy Wincy Spider!”

How to succeed at IKEA without really trying…

Mission: To buy only what you came for

1. Enter IKEA facility
2. Collect a trolley (without wobbly wheels)
3. Review your shopping list
4. Do not add ANY “new, interesting and completely unpronounceable thingies to your list”. See Step 3.
5. Enter the EXIT. That’s right the exit.
6. Locate your items in storage area and add them to your trolley
7. Purchase item/s ONLY on shopping list. See Step 3.
8. Leave IKEA and pack in your car
9. Go home

I  loathe going to IKEA. It’s just so neat and organised and sooo tidy. I find it INTIMIDATING. Plus, they hide the exit so I have to wander through all the different areas of IKEA and be constantly reminded how unorganised my own home is. My stuff is in cupboards. You almost have to sign a waiver to open them. “Please sign here lest any objects fall on your head. No claims for damages, blah, blah, blah.”

So I devised this little action plan on entering via the exit! It’s pure genius! No impulse buys as everything is in boxes, no queuing cause you’ve already sussed which cashier is the fastest. Just straight in and out!

My record is 10 minutes. What’s yours?

 

Job hunting vs. dating

You must have been wondering where I have been all this time. I’m running the job hunting gauntlet. It’s funny how it wears you down after a while.

At first I was totally pumped. Resumes and cover letters flowed like water out of my sent items. Now it’s more of a trickle as fewer jobs are advertised.

And THEN, when I do get an interview it’s like an awkward first date. There are so many hidden rules to stay on top of!

1. Don’t mention the ex in bad terms. Don’t be too specific… it wasn’t working out between us, I wanted a new challenge (rather than the conditions were terrible!)
2. Let them call you. Be engaging but not overly keen. Interested but not desperate.
3. Commitment. I’m in if you are but are you?
4. Who pays and how much… similar to “holding the door open for a lady” situation. It’s offensive not to offer but what happens if she rejects the offer all together?
5. When do you call back? Should you call them or wait for them to call you?
6. Was it something I said? Or didn’t say?
7. Expectation. Will there be another meet up? Will we talk more about commitment, money and how we’ll “work together”?
8. When do you move on and look for new “opportunities”? Should you let them know it isn’t an exclusive relationship?

Face squishing

You know there are some things that I thought I would never love about parenting. The noise for starters but there is one thing that my little girl introduced me to recently. The face squishing. Every morning the kids come into our bed for a morning cuddle and she snuggles in close and squishes my face with hers. And I love it. My son never did this, he was more of a face jumper! It was brutal alarm clock by comparison…

Is there anything about parenting that you thought you would loathe but found out that you love?

Keep your elbows sharp

I’m going on a course today which leaves me a) toddler free and b) on public transport.
Normally catching a train has been about keeping my elbows sharp to squeeze into a crowded train and get that last seat! I got very good at it over the years.
Today it’s not peak hour, I have my ebook reader with me and I’m not in a hurry. It’s the Orient Express as far as I’m concerned!
Happy commuting Sydney!

The Queen of Distraction

So where have I been for weeks? I wish I could give you an exciting answer but really I’ve just been in Busyland. I’ve got two toddlers, I’m studying part-time and running a playgroup. Plus washing, ironing (did I say ironing… well that’s a lie right there) cooking and cleaning. What an exciting life I lead. 😐

Yesterday I was supposed to be doing assignments all day. It’s amazing how when I have a deadline I get so distracted my Facebook and messages, email and even health fund claims! When it comes to distraction, I am Queen of them all.

I did manage to complete all 3 assignments and do a fabulous presentation on crocheting that evening. I’ve really enjoyed studying but now the course is coming to a close and I have to find-a-job. *Yawn* Though my current job as a stay-at-home mum doesn’t pay well (or at all) as I have bemoaned before in my post about needing a house slave I have to say it’s the most rewarding and incredibly difficult job I’ve had. I love my cheeky monkeys to bits!

When are you the most distracted and why?

B is for bored

Bored and I used to be such good friends.

As a teenager I was often seen “out and about” with Bored. Actually it wasn’t just Bored and I, there was Hormonal-as-anything, Moody, Sulky and I-know-everything-just-ask-me. Our little gang was whole alphabet of FUN.

But right about now I would really like to invite Bored back into my life. It would be fun to be bored for a little while. Recently Busy has pushed her way in and just can’t take the hint to leave. So Busy while you’re leaving can you please take Disorganised and Chaos with you!

Which words would you like to invite back to your life and why?

Give peas a chance

Husband-o-mine has accused me of feeding our children sausages every night which is of course a HUGE exaggeration as I only do it every second night. Our son now tells me he doesn’t like sausages which is such a shame as it was one of my weekly staples. Sausages fit nicely into that look-at-the-time what-will take-10-minutes-to-cook category.

Sometimes I flick the telly on in the evenings and see that Masterchef show where the contestants cry into their proverbial soups cause their soufflé sank and I think “Why are YOU crying?” My kids should be the ones crying. We have scrambled eggs one night, sausages the next, a cooked chicken or spaghetti bolognese – quick, simple and sometimes very burnt.

Husband-o-mine is a fab chef actually. I would be too if I wasn’t looking after tired out children but I think the difference is that he enjoys the process of cooking whereas I would prefer just to eat it. I’m a simple girl with simple needs.

So children everywhere, please don’t be too hard on your Mummy and give peas a chance… She does love you!

 

Snot face

I thought I was outta the woods almost 3 weeks after my tonsillectomy, sinus and septoplasty operation. Until today I was doing so well and had weaned myself off my impressive collection of painkillers but then my nose started clogging up again today. Scary things came out of there. Sneezed out actually. It was so incredibly painful, far worse than the actual post operation blues period. I actually contemplated cutting the end off my nose today!

So out of sheer desperation I rang up a doctor friend of mine and being the super-connected guy that he is he made some pertinent calls so I didn’t have to sit in ER for hours to be sent home with paracetamol.

He prescribed:

• Go see your ENT surgeon tomorrow
•  Take Nurofen (I love you Nurofen)
• Sleep

Yes sir! Good night.

eBay hound licks her wounds

I’ve always prided myself on being a bit of a bargain hunter. My very first op-shop purchase was in the fine town of Hereford in the west of England about 20 years ago. It was a gorgeous navy blue velvet jacket for 3 quid! I still have it and wear it to this day.

Then the world changed with the advent of the internet (yeah remember when it wasn’t around?) and all of a sudden we all started doing things online. Even our bargain shopping. So it was a natural progression that my very well established op-shop addiction moved onto eBay.

I’ve bought clothes for myself, toys, kids clothes and nifty kitchen gadgets on eBay but until last week I had never bought anything remotely “technology” related. You see I have an Android mobile and I flog it pretty hard for social media, internet and eBay purposes. And the poor thing finally gave up the ghost. I was so horrified by the brand new iPhone prices (I mean I could fly to Thailand for less!) that I decided to shop online for a second hand one. Being so very “experienced” at eBay shopping I knew which key phrases I needed “iPhone 4 unlocked” “Australia only” “Excellent Used Condition” etc. And I snapped one up. Woohoo! Clever me.

Then it turned out it was locked. So I contacted the buyer who very helpfully had it unlocked in a jiffy. Clever and resourceful me.

Then I put in on the windowsill above my kitchen sink on top of (but not IN) its Lifeproof case.

And it fell into the sink, onto a plate covered in water.

I didn’t discover this for oohh  say 5 minutes as my 20 month old daughter had just woken up from a nap and was in-a-bad-mood rolling all over the floor and crying. When I discovered what had happened I started crying too! I yanked it outta there and into a bowl of rice.

And now we and see what happens next…

Sometimes it doesn’t pay to be too clever! This eBay hound is licking her wounds…